Little Monkey and Friends

Ok, I know I should not make light of global warming. I know there's a hole in the ozone layer. I know the polar ice caps are melting. But despite knowing all these things, can I just say how psyched I was by the gorgeously warm weather yesterday? Expressing joy at the unnaturally balmy day will doom me to lectures galore from the tree-hugging contingent of my family, but I confess - I love this weather. Freaky warm days in January must be enjoyed. Without spending too much time dwelling on why the temperature hit over 60 degrees on Monday, the monkey and I chose to take advantage. We hit the deck with the furball and blew bubbles. Ok, I did the labor intensive part, and the monkey chased after them. No doubt, the toxic chemicals found in the bubble soap will necessitate an environmental impact statement as well, but I will file that under my growing list of things to worry about later.




The monkey's keen powers of observation at work.



Right... there they are. The chase is on.



The warm weather confuses Oscar, who is hit with spring fever. Love blooms.

In mommyland, one often reflects back on the day when going out was a regular event. Actually having a social life was part of of the fun of being without child. The funny thing is though, now that we have a monkey in tow, our social life is not as extinct as I pictured it would be. Granted, it's taken on a different flavor, but I'd still call it "social." (And not like the "Physics Club" yearly formal, for those of you who can recall Judd Nelson - Breakfast Club line)

The monkey's social calendar this weekend was admirably booked up as usual. Even in my youthful heyday (..about a hundred years ago), I don't think I went out this much. On Saturday, he celebrated with Grace, who just turned one. And on Sunday, it was time to party with Ava, also a mature little one year old. A very Happy Birthday to two gorgeous babies.

A few observations following a wild weekend of partying with the monkey:

One year olds have a lot of stamina, and they don't need caffeine or other stimulants to achieve it.

Little monkeys do not trouble themselves with unneccesary guilt should they choose to eat nothing but cake at a meal.

It's more fun to walk around and hit the dance floor than it is to sit at your assigned seat all afternoon.

Who needs to nap after a long day of excitement when there are toys to play with and goody bags to open?

It really doesn't matter what you wear, as long as you can spill stuff all over it.

Balloons rock.


Happy Birthday Grace!




Grace's mom, Kristen practices for her moonlighting gig as a storyteller.




It's always a good idea to take someone to a party who will point out when you have stuff in your teeth. Thanks for lookin' out, monkey.



We like cake.





Making balloon shapes is not as easy as it looks.












The 80's make for a good dance soundtrack.
















The monkey pauses between songs to kick back with a cold one.

Round two of the little monkey's birthday celebration continued today as we joined the staff at NY-Presbyterian for a lunch in honor of the one-year anniversary of Jordan's heart transplant. A year ago tonight Jordan had his re-birth, so to speak.

On hand to help capture the festivities were various media and press reporters, because after all, it's not a party unless there are some serious cameras in your face and you get it written up in the paper. We haven't made it to Page 6 yet, but we're working on it. And we'll see what the broadcasts look like tonight on the local news channels. Amazingly, the monkey handles all this attention like a seasoned celebrity. It's mom and dad that seem to crack under pressure. Between the old monkey's breaking into a flop sweat at the sight of a camera light, and my tongue-tied inability to string two words together in a sentence, it's surprising the little guy gets as much press as he does. Hopefully he won't look back at our media attention in utter embarrassment. But then again, what kid doesn't look back at their parents antics with utter embarrassment? Might as well give him something to be embarrassed about. At least we've managed to avoid the Springer-style talk show circuit...for now.

If Oprah comes calling however, look out. I am so there.

After weeks of planning, we got to celebrate the little monkey's first birthday in grand style. From near and far, friends and family gathered together and made the party a memorable one.







Dressed to impress, the little monkey sets the dress code and dons his first suit.















Uncle Riz and Aunt T flew in from Buffalo to help celebrate and lent a hand with party details.



Uncle Osman joined us from Boulder, CO. The little monkey's family is spread out all over the country. Hopefully, we all have good frequent flier plans.



A recent edition to the family also made it out to party. Here's a brand new one - little Jessica Paige Sperling with her gorgeous mommy, Cindy and proud Grandpa Jack.




We have a lot of gorgeous mommies in this family.



The moms and dads all hit the dance floor at the party, helping to show the little ones that you are never too young (or too old)to get your groove on.



After which, the younger set showed us what it was like to be limber and flexible.




With little ones of all ages, there was something to do for everyone.





Including eat - of course. Here the little monkey expresses hearty enthusiasm for a cranberry muffin.



He also mingled among the guests.



And shared a moment with Grandma Bilqis.











Some party details kept things colorful.













And Aunt T demonstrated her creativity with the centerpeices.















Of course, there was ice cream cake.



Blowing out the candles required a little help...



But that's what parents are for.

Today is Jordan's first birthday - a big day, by any standard. But for us, this milestone takes on a whole new meaning. One year post tranplant, with no signs of rejection, and we couldn't be happier. The old monkey has expressed our thoughts pretty well here. All I can add is that a picture is worth a thousand words, sometimes. Here's where what we faced a year ago.





Jordan on a heart-lung bypass machine, called ECMO.






And today.

Since there is never any tactful way to discuss the issue of birthday presents, let me start by conceding that I have no tact. Now that we're clear on that point, I might as well say what's on my mind.

Many generous and well meaning friends and family have asked what would make a good gift for the little monkey's upcoming birthday. I've spent some time thinking about this, believe it or not. This is my conclusion.

I honestly believe that Jordan has been showered with such generosity over the year, that any additional gifts are unnecessary. This upcoming party is truly intended as a chance to celebrate with our close friends and family and take a moment to reflect on what an amazing year we all have had. Not to sound too Mommy Dearest or anything, but Jordan doesn't really need any presents.

But, for those of you invitees who, like me, hate to show up empty handed to anything, here are some suggestions as to what would make the perfect gift. Feel free to give Jordan a birthday card indicating which option you selected. I promise these will be saved for his 1st year book.

1. Make the decision to become an organ donor, and discuss it with your family. Sign the back of your license if you haven't already, but more importantly, make your intentions known to your loved ones. No one thinks about topics like this, and the idea of it seems slightly discomforting because it means considering your own mortality. Until Jordan's trauma, I never thought about it either. Needless to say, my thoughts on the subject have changed considerably.

2. Register with the National Bone Marrow Donor program. The National Marrow Donor Program® (NMDP), a federally funded nonprofit organization, was created to improve the effectiveness of the search for donors. The NMDP maintains an international registry of volunteers willing to be donors for all sources of blood stem cells used in transplantation: bone marrow, peripheral blood, and umbilical cord blood.

3. If you'd like to spend money, consider a donation to The Children's Organ Transplant Association. This advocacy group raises money to help children's families cope with the enormous costs associated with transplant medical care. Their focus is on pediatric organ transplants, obviously an issue near and dear to us.

4. And finally, as you all know, the one special person who is responsible for Jordan's most precious gift was a little girl named Breanna Maree Loomis. Her tragic death was not in vain. And a memorial in her memory was established last year to help offset the medical costs faced by her family. If you'd like to celebrate Jordan's birthday, you can honor the little girl who gave him a second chance at life.

Donations to her memorial fund can be sent to:

Breanna Maree Loomis Memorial Fund
c/o Nicole Barton
The Alpine Bank
1700 N Alpine Rd., Rockford, IL 61107
(815) 398-6500


Once again, thanks everyone for your incredible love and support. We can't wait to see you all at the party!

-S

We came, we saw, and we got through a very tiring day. Today, the little monkey faced down another biopsy - this one was called as "annual." Regular biopsies measure any signs of rejection of the heart organ. This biopsy was more comprehensive in that it also evaluated any signs of deterioration of the major cardiac vessels. Regular biopsies take about an hour or so, plus recovery time. This one took two hours for the procedure and four hours of recovery time in the hospital. That doesn’t count the endless hours of waiting for the procedure itself to commence.

Any surgery carries risks. The old monkey and I are so well versed in the laundry list of potential risks associated with heart biopsies that we usually skip that part when the anesthesiologist or attending comes in to speak with us. (Boy, these kids are looking really young lately. That inspires confidence.) I do remember the first time an anesthesiologist explained the possible risks associated with a biopsy and sedation. I think I had a mild out-of-body experience when he said the word, “stroke.” It’s a little fuzzy. I know a year or so was shaved off my own life span after that. These days, we take it in stride.

There are some things I completely shy away from though – first among them is standing witness to the actual act of sedating the monkey. I learned that lesson the hard way. And although it makes me cringe to watch him wheeled away into the procedure room, alone, I know I am not doing him any favors by watching him struggle as the doctor slips a gas mask over his face. I’ll opt out of watching that because it does neither of us any good. Watching someone so little, in such a big, big hospital gurney-bed is a disturbing sight. It crushes me to see someone so small have to face something so big, all on his own. I wonder what is going on in his mind as he is wheeled away, bright light all around him, and strange faces peering into his eyes. If only he wasn’t so little.

The hardest thing from my perspective is depriving the monkey of food or water. You’d think such a picky eater would be indifferent to the absence of food. But apparently, when the monkey is hungry, he is REALLY, REALLY HUNGRY!!! Or thirsty, as the case may be. The drill is as follows: No food or formula after 2:00 am. From 2:00 – 6:00 am, he can have water or apple juice. After 6:00 am, nothing on. The little monkey was scheduled to be at the hospital at 8:00. Since another patient was scheduled ahead of us (a scheduling disaster from our perspective), I estimated that the little guy would not go in for sedation until 11:00 am. So, armed with this timetable, we planned.

The day before the biopsy, I force fed the monkey round-the-clock with all manner of food that I knew he liked and would eat … a lot of. Nutritional considerations were laid aside, in favor of the practical necessity of getting him full. Thus, the day’s menu consisted of yogurt, fortified thickened rice cereal, mashed potatoes, potato bread, veggies, crackers, cheese, cheerios, fruit bars, and formula at every opportunity. We even decided to wake the monkey up at 1:30 in the morning, the day of the procedure, to feed him another bottle before his window of eating opportunity was closed. He took a few ounces, under protest, and tried to settle in for some sleep. But we woke him up again at 5:30, to offer him some apple juice and some water, while he still had time. That was flatly rejected.

At that point, we were up for the day. (Oh what a beautiful morning! Oh what a beautiful day!) We left the house shortly after 7:00 am, accompanied by the whining sounds of little monkey who was beginning to notice the lack of a breakfast bottle. But there was so much ahead of us to do – check in, paperwork, poking with a stethoscope, weigh-in, blood pressure tests, height measurements, and of course our favorite – the timed blood draw. A detached observer might note that five vials of blood drawn from the small veins of such a little monkey might seem a bit excessive. But, we chalked this up to the comprehensive nature of the annual. So as to give you a full sense of what it was like to be there, imagine a soundtrack of blood-curdling baby screams playing in the background. Ahh, bliss.

The nursing staff at the cath lab was great. They deserve a lot of credit. They did what they could to comfort the little monkey and keep him relaxed during the hours while we waited for him to be taken into surgery. Babies awaiting biopsies on empty stomachs don’t make the best patients. Despite their diminutive status, they have very big wants – chief among them, food. Although they can’t communicate with words, they make their displeasure known. Loudly. And the little monkey did not let us down in this regard. We packed a suitcase full of toys to keep him distracted, but there’s only so much block stacking and rattle shaking you can tolerate when your stomach is rumbling.

Finally, it was time. The little monkey was wheeled away, and we settled in for some anxious hours. We ate, read the paper, dozed, and hoped for the best. Two hours later, the little monkey was brought back – groggy and glassy eyed, but still our monkey despite it all. As the effects of the anesthesia wore off, we were permitted to feed him a few ounces of water, then formula, then his medications. Gradually, he began to lift from his very drugged out demeanor, and make the monkey noises we know and love. More feeding followed, as well as some impressive diaper displays. Cartoons worked for a while to keep him calm, but the next four hours of recovery and observation time were long and tiring.

But the little monkey made it through them, and eventually, we were discharged. As usual, he made it through the ordeal with more smiles than I could muster, a few laughs, and a lot of resilience. His patience puts me to shame. Initial assessment by the doctor is positive, although official results will have to wait till next week. And so we settle in and wait some more. Stay tuned.

Baby #2 update

The verdict's in. According to today's ultrasound, baby number 2 is officially a girl. I can now refer to "it" as "her.." or "she" as the case may be.

Her first milestone.

Of course, the doctor wasn't 100% certain. It's still pretty early, and the baby wasn't being very cooperative for the camera. But he seemed fairly sure...80% sure to be exact... that this one is a girl. I can now safely dispose of all those infant clothes of little monkey's that I was holding onto - just in case.

I watched the ultrasound pictures while on the screen during the exam, and I had no idea what that thing (it's a she!) in there was. Vaguely resembling a baby-like object, it could have been anything. Guessing the gender was totally beyond me.

Now that we know...err..80% or so... I can plan. Ahhh...

Hurray!! Finally the new episodes start tonight. (I'm not buying this whole Luke-has-a-secret-daughter thing, BTW).

And before you write off the GG, little monkey actually does have a show connection. One of his favorite "calming songs" happens to be the show's title song - "Where you Lead", sung by Carole King. "Calming song" refers to those tried and true songs that I force myself to sing whenever the monkey needs to be brought back from a meltdown, distracted, or put at ease. Situations include mealtime, diaper changes, clothing changes, bath time, new situations with lots of people, doctors' offices, following a tumble, snack time, medicine fun time, nap time, waking up in the middle of the night time.. etc.

I never imagined I'd be doing this much singing, ever. So, I'm always on the lookout for a good song, with simple lyrics which won't drive me nuts. Most of the kiddie standards fail in this regard, for the simple reason that they ingrain themselves into my brain, burn a hole in it, and remain smoldering away, all day long. Thus, when I have "wheels on the bus go round and round" playing in an endless loop in my head, all day long, I feel especially appreciative that the monkey's music repetoire is expanding.

Being in a hospital is never fun. And it's especially not fun when the patient in question is your brand-new, teeny tiny baby. As awful as it was a year ago, when we were in the hospital with Jordan, one of the bright spots in the situation was getting to meet other parents. One couple really stood out, Vinny and Patty, and their baby girl Mallory - who turned one year old recently. Yesterday, we were lucky enough to be able to attend her very special birthday party. Looking at Mallory, you would never be able to tell all that she has gone through. Maybe that's the true blessing - seeing her as just another normal, happy, healthy little girl.




The birthday girl looked very sweet in her soft pink dress with matching fur trim.







The little monkey scans the surroundings, biding his time before throwing down his sweet dance moves. I was really thrilled to see that those endless mind-numbing hours of music class had paid off.



A special guest appearance by your friend and mine - Elmo.



The partying wore out the little monkey, who crashed on the couch immediately after we got home. I don't know what Oscar's excuse was, but he made himself comfortable too.

This morning's clinic is finally over, and overall, it went much better than usual. I guess the way to approach these things is to go in there expecting the worst. And that way, nothing will come as a shock.

Jordan weighed in at 18 pounds, and 28 3/4 inches. That was a gain of a pound and an inch growth since last check in. He had an EKG, an echocardiogram, a timed blood draw, and a doctor exam. Overall, he handled everything like a champ. The echo, which I've found is usually the hardest to deal with (because it's a little long, the probe is a little cold, the table is uncomfortable, and the room is always a little chilly..) wasn't too bad. Jordan actually remained relatively quiet throughout. The technician did her best to frighten the little monkey with her shrill singing, but thankfully, cartoons (what the heck were those things?? Doodlebops?? More like Freaks. Complete freaks. This is what kids watch these days???) were on the television set. That was enough of a distraction to keep monkey calm. Of course when the cathode stickers were ripped off, all hell broke loose..but what are you gonna do? I liken the experience to the joys of waxing, but obviously the little monkey can't appreciate that I feel his pain.

While we were waiting in the waiting area, we endured a good half hour of another youngster struggling with his echo. His screams formed a steady background muzak that was hard to ignore. Jordan's response was original, if disturbing. He actually burst out laughing at one point, which we thought was rather smug and in bad form. As we reminded him, it wasn't that long ago that he was screaming like a banshee as well. About 5 minutes earlier, as a matter of fact.

The little monkey's increased mobility makes for some fun times in the waiting area. He occupied himself with much crawling, ball chasing, and mingling with other youngsters waiting for their procedures. We met two little ones almost the same age. Both seemed happy and thriving, and were attached to the hands of their parents, who were also helping them take their first steps.

The wait to see the doctor was worth it for her reassuring announcement. After reviewing the echo results, she said if it weren't for the sticker on the chart, identifying Jordan as a heart transplant patient, the results were like those of a normal, healthy heart. That is seriously happy news, as always. Next week, we have the "annual" exam, which consists of an even more extensive biopsy than usual as well as a thorough work up to assess how the little monkey is handling his heart.

Stay tuned.



The little monkey is determined..



the climb great heights. Or these stairs..at least.

Hard to believe, but sometimes I actually forget I'm pregnant...again.
And then of course I look down and see this bulge growing where my stomach used to be. And then I feel a wave of nausea, which I attribute to baby #2 - not the bulge. Although at this point, they are one and the same. This time around feels radically different than the first time. I feel a lot more tired, a lot more sick, and there are a lot of inexplicable aches and pains. Some helpful folks have suggested that this means I am having a girl..because of course, who else but a girl baby would cause such discomfort. Close mother-daughter relations begin early, I suppose..

Today, we had a ob/gyn checkup, which for the uninitiated means a chance to pee in a cup, get poked and prodded, weighed (hurray! And with jeans on no less!) have blood drawn, and get asked a lot of personal questions. Both old and new monkey came along for the visit. The little monkey had fun trying to walk around in the waiting room, and got a front row seat to listen in as the nurse practitioner gave us a chance to listen to baby-to-be's heart beat. The little monkey actually paused for a second, while drinking his milk, to listen to the sound that filled the room. That was fun. Then the monkey had a melt down and we had to wrap things up quickly.

More tests to follow, including early trimester fetal screening. Although the little monkey's doctors assure us that what happened with him was a freak and random occurance, it's hard to stay as calm as I'd like. But we'll try. Everything looks good so far. In the meantime, I'm just going to keep running around after the little monkey, who seems determined to learn how to walk.

The old monkey complained that the last post was too scary. So, in deference to my gentle readers, here is a new picture.

Completely random, mindless internet surfing is an activity that I rarely engage in. With a house full of monkeys and another on the way, most of my spare time is spent catching up on sleep. But tonight, is a special night indeed. The little monkey fell asleep early, and the old monkey is out on the town partying...er..I mean, meeting up with some friends from college.

I have to share this site, for no other reason than it has taught me the definition of that elusive word in the Eagles classic, "Hotel California." What a sheltered life I have led indeed.

This New Year's Eve was a remarkably low-key and relaxing one. Exactly what we needed. First, a trip out to visit the little monkey's Uncle Alessandro in Long Island..(cheecho!) Massive amounts of food were consumed. Even the little monkey did his share. Upon returning to Jersey, we managed to stuff ourselves yet again over a special dinner. Grandma H and Michael prepared roast lamb, latkes, and pumpkin pie. And then Jeff and I teamed up to roundly defeat them at a cutthroat game of trivial pursuit.

Look out people, we're gettin' crazy now.





No amount of coaxing could convince the little monkey to actually look AT the camera. Little monkey has a long way to go before rivaling his uncle's sneaker collection... but we'll work on it.













For 2006, the little monkey has resolved to really try and listen better...



..to be more in touch with his feelings..




...to develop better eating habits.



Happy New Year!