Little Monkey and Friends

We're back from our holiday break, visiting my folks in the vast wilderness known as "upstate NY." We endured a long mini-van ride over the river and through the woods, to Grandma B's house we go! Though he was still recovering from his most recent stomach bug, the Little Monkey was quite taken with exploring my parents' house, as well as the bewildering amount of stuff that is contained within its walls. Food? Who needs food?

My mother is an excellent cook, and I was really looking forward to eating many meals at her table. Of course, I had no illusions that the monkey would share my interest in this regard. Needless to say, he lived up to my expectations. While other children sat down to tables heaped with Thanksgiving abundance, my child preferred to spend his time playing with plastic fruit. Here, Monkey Sr. is literally cornering him the sitting room - baby alphabet pasta in one hand, and a heaping of desperation in the other. Though that spoon may make it to the vicinity of the monkey's mouth, actually getting it in there is another story. While the rest of us stuffed ourselves shamelessly, the Little Monkey remained resolutely Spartan in his fasting purity.

Notwithstanding the eating issues, I did get a kick out of seeing the little guy wandering the old family homestead. While he's visited there before, he's at an age now where he's mobile, exploring every nook, and asking questions. I always loved the area where my parents' house is located. It's a lovely mix of woods, big skies, and fresh air. At night, it gets dark enough to actually see all the stars in the sky. And you can usually catch a few deer wandering around in the back yard looking for apples, fallen from the trees. Of course, there are all manner of wildlife wandering the property looking for food since my mother has taken it upon herself to feed anything that walks, flies, or hops within fifty feet of front door. I kid you not when I say that I saw the world's largest furry, orange cat come waddling up our driveway for its daily meal. And it waited outside the front door until my mom came out with a plate of cut up turkey she had cooked herself.

But I digess. Here's what I wanted to say. It was a thrill seeing my little guy exploring the home I grew up in. I got to show him the back yard where I played; we walked up and down the stairs I once stormed in fits of teenager anger. With his fresh eyes, I rediscovered the fun of shaking fuzzy milkpods loose from their moorings, and watching the "poofs" go floating in the wind. And I heard him laugh. I made him smile, and that felt really good.



Miss Mina has been eating well. It takes a lot of calories to maintain those cheeks, chins and dimples, you know.

Little monkey #1 is sick again, with some sort of virus that has rendered him irritable and tired. It started with a fever, which comes and goes. He's drinking plenty of milk, but not eating so much. And he's napping a lot, when he's not wandering around the house aimlessly, looking for some comfort and diversion. We've been reading a lot of books - the Very Hungry Caterpillar is a favorite. He likes to recite the list of the Caterpillar's indulgences on Saturday ("he ate through one peice of chocolate cake, one peice of swiss cheese, one lollipop, etc.")

I wholeheartedly applaud mr. Caterpillar's approach - consume the most calories possible on the weekend, and resume dieting come Monday.

Monkey, on the other hand, is eating very little. Even less than he normally does. Some cereal here, a bite or two of pancake there, some muffin, some banana. Although he keeps shouting, "cookie," when offered one, he will only take a nibble, then put it aside with a soft, "thank you." Oy, that gets me every time.

I hope he gets better soon. It's never any fun when he's sick. On the plus side, he's letting me hold him in my lap, while we lounge on the couch and watch Noggin. He rarely permits this, as he would prefer to do his television viewing while on the go. So, there we sit, monkey in my arms, sippy cup in his, Dora on the tube. If he wasn't so listless, I'd be content with how wonderful it felt to hold him like a little baby again. As it is, I'd rather see him running around like his old, toddler-in-action self.

stream of thought writing up ahead.

A collection of thoughts that have been on my mind:

Why does J seem so quiet sometimes, with such a faraway look? We get to gym class, we walk in holding hands, and it takes him several minutes to warm up to the place. He ran off today, to go play with something - which was a good sign. Sometimes, he will just stand there staring until I direct him towards a toy or game. Today, he seemed content to run around and amuse himself. That was unusual.

Why do the squirrels keep coming back to bury nuts in my backyard, even though Oscar runs out there every time to chase them away?

I'm glad Pakistan is finally revising the Hudood ordinances and prosecuting rape under the penal law as opposed to Sharia "courts." Even with the capitulation on some sections to the mullah elements of the Legislature, the bill is a step in the right direction. When will this country join the 21st century already?

Why does it seem like I am always at the grocery store? I never know what to make for dinner, I always have to make lists, I always have to create meal plans for the week or I go nuts. I wish I had my own chef.

I can't believe J will be two years old in two months. Wow.

I can't believe M is still not sleeping through the night. She's killing me over here. I can't believe how tired I am when I "wake up" in the morning. I can't envision keeping this up much longer. She has such nice long stretches sometimes. And for awhile she was doing so good. What happened?

Thinking about the upcoming Thanksgiving holiday. I'm glad I'm not cooking.

That cupcake last night was really good. Watching the Office, while eating a cupcake was pretty good. Liked the Office. Jim is cute. Loved the scene with Stanley and the one of the new Stamford workers who tried to give him the "what up?" nod. I love Steve Carell. I don't know how to spell his name though. I'd like to see a comedy laugh off between Steve Carell and John Stuart.

I can't decide how I feel about the new writing on the Gilmore Girls. The Times did a story on it recently that suggested it was too warm and fuzzy and sell out, since the departure of the original writers - Amy Sherman Palladino and her husband. I dunno. I like that Lorelai and Christopher are back together. But as much of a romantic as I am, even I had a hard time buying that whole romp-in-Paris thing this week. That was a little too Care Bear, even for me.

Looking forward to my first Miami Hurricanes game this weekend over at Casa Perkins. Go Canes!

I wrote earlier about a website that inspired me to find more beauty in my daily life. This week, here's what struck me:

1. The vacuum was laying out in the hallway upstairs as J ran back and forth, recharged from his nap. He approached it with his usual blend of fascination and fear, touched the front face panel, examined the hose, and tried to pry the attachment nozzle off. The combination of plastic pieces hitting each other produced a funny little noise from the machine - an odd sort of click or clack. He looked up at me, and with perfect sincerity announced that it was "Farty."

2. Old Bess, our lovely mini-van-on-loan, has been acting up again. Because there is only one repair shop the old monkey trusts, he took the van all the way back to Brooklyn to get it fixed there. Was this beautiful? No. But he came back home with bags of Thai food from Joya - a favorite Brooklyn restaurant back in the day. It was a bittersweet (and oh-so-tasty) reminder of a former life.

3. I had an actual mother's night out this week. I paid dearly for it the next day, but it was worth it. And everyone pitched in to see that I got out and back home safely, and that the monkeys were fed, bathed, medicated, put to bed and watched over with love. It was a true team effort. Thanks!



Baby girls in soft, pink shoes and fuzzy white tights are a beautiful thing too, especially when they get one hand stuck in their sleeve. Happy 4-month birthday Miss Mina. Time is flying by so fast!

We had clinic, which I hate. But today, we made it through the morning. Today, the little guy cried a lot when they took five vials of blood from his arm. But, he also said, "thank you," as we left the room. He also smiled and ate chocolate teddy grahams and drank milk from his cup. He raced up and down the hallways of the hospital and counted the fish in the pictures that lined the wall. He hated the echocardiogram and EKG, but he liked the parachute that was painted in the room, and I heard him say, "I love you mommy," for the first time ever.




Today, I felt like crying when they ripped the cathode stickers off his chest. But then I remembered, that when we take our little guy home, he will be all smiles again. And then I remembered how very lucky we are that we get to take him home at all. And then I felt grateful.



I hated leaving my baby girl at home. I hated feeling torn between caring for one child who needed me, and another who needed me too. I hated the feeling of missing her soft weighted body in my arms. And then I remembered how lucky I was that she would be home when I returned. And I felt grateful that she was cared for while I was gone.




In the waiting room, I saw magazines with pretty pictures of perfect children and beautiful clothes, toys and houses. And I paused for a minute to think about how wonderful my family is. And I felt grateful. We have each other. And today wasn't that bad after all.

-Sadaf

ps. And I'm really grateful that they are both napping AT THE SAME TIME right now!!

Boy do, I love the swing. I could stay here all day. Why won't she push me any higher? Why can't I have another cookie? Ooh...a cookie..on the swing...at the same time. Now that would be really, really good. Hmm..what's that kid doing?



Why am I on this table again? Why does this woman lay me here every friggin' hour? Why is she pointing that flashing thing in my face? Hey. You. Woman up there...feed me already. Yes, again. Not everyone in this house has to be on a diet ya know.

La, la la...It's such a beautiful day out today...what shall I wear? Ohmigod!!! It's fall, and there's a whole pile of dresses I never got around to modelling!! Mom, how could you?!??



Why was I never taken out in public in this frilly, white dress with matching bloomies?



And it tastes really good too!



And have you seen anything to match the fabulous-ness of this Jackie O. inspired pink dress, with matching frock coat and shoes? Jeesh, mom, why have I been wearing Old Navy onesies every friggin' day?



I must look into the possibility of hiring my own stylist. Mom's ok for some stuff, but she needs some help in the fashion department, I think.



Not to be outdone by his sister, Little Monkey 1.0 poses for the camera too.

Blogger annoys me to no end, but every so often I get a kick out of a randomly featured site they highlight. Recently, I found one called Three Beautiful Things. As the name suggests, the blog is a daily chronicle of three random things the author found inspiring. Unlike much of the whining and narcissistic writing out there - mine included, this blog seems designed to just share a little bit of happiness with the world.

I like that.

Keeping with the spirit of that, here's my random contribution:

1. Miss Mina's pink courdroy pants with faux-fur trimmed hoodie vest.

2. That my not-quite 2 year-old son has recently learned to say the word, "please." The fact that he is using it to manipulate us shamelessly is another story.

3. My friend Jennifer's completion of the NYC Marathon. Reading about her journey made me want to cheer.

It's not terribly profound, but something about the concept appeals to me. I guess I like the way she stops long enough to notice the little details that add beauty to our lives.

ps - congrats to the old monkey for finally jumping into the blogging world, with his own contribution.

What's for dinner, Mom?



How many calories did you say it has?



I dunno...it looks pretty rich.



How you doing with that diet there, Mom? Bwaa.. ha ha!

Today is Sunday - a beautiful fall day. The leaves on the tree outside our window are a warm red. Many still cling to the branches; others amass in random patterns on the grass below. The squirrels are running around constantly, much to the chagrin of Oscar, our fearless hunting Brussels Griffon. He has made it his mission to chase them down from whence they came. It's been months since he assigned himself this task. He has yet to actually catch one - or even scare them for that matter.

Lots of people are doing lots of important things today. Others are probably doing not much of anything. As for me, I'm running around after my two monkeys. When one naps, the other is inevitably awake and needing something - food, a diaper change, some entertainment, or just a cuddle. In between that, I'm also deep in thought, thinking about today. Today is a special day for another reason. Today was the day a little girl was born. Her name was Breanna, and she wound up saving my son's life. She would have been two years old today.

Remembering her on her birthday is simple. But I also remember her on other days, at other times, in seemingly random ways. Like when I hold Jordan close to me, in those rare moments when he isn't running in the opposite direction. When I hold him tight, with my arms wrapped securely around him and his chest pressed to mine - I can feel his heart beat. And then I remember Breanna because I know that it is her heart that keeps Jordan alive.

Sometimes, I see Jordan staring into the distance, and I wonder what he's thinking. I wonder what goes on his mind. I wonder too, sometimes how I will ever explain to him everything he has been through. Will he ever understand the enormity of it all? Will he appreciate the second chance he was given by a special little girl?

Happy Birthday Breanna. Rest in peace little one. I remember you always.

After months of boycotting circle time, with all its attending songs, dances and parachutes, little monkey has suddenly decided to revisit the issue.



And I think he likes it.



which cracks Miss Mina up.