Showing posts with label daily grind. Show all posts
Showing posts with label daily grind. Show all posts

Tuesday, January 06, 2015

When a store gets it right in Bermuda.

image

As much as I like to complain about shopping in Bermuda, sometimes you have to point out a place that has their business model together.

Cheers to Yo Cherry, a lovely little frozen yogurt shop, located on Bermudiana Road in Hamilton. 

What they do right? 

A rotating selection of frozen yogurt and assorted toppings and sauces, a clean shop, cute outdoor seating, friendly staff that doesn't mind giving out tastes to the little ones, generous hours of operation, convenient location, and a working website!  If you've lived in Bermuda long enough, you know all of these things together is a rarity.

We are in there at least once a week.  There's always customers coming in and out.  My kids ask for fro yo as a reward for all kinds of things - acing a spelling test, getting clipped to the top of the chart in school, remembering to brush their teeth in the morning (ok, I made that one up.)

Granted, it isn't cheap.  Like most fro yo places, you pay per ounce of serving and toppings ("That's how they getcha!"  bwha hahahah!!)  We never walk out of there paying less than $10-$12 for two small containers of dessert, and that's with my very close supervision of what my kids put on their sundae.  But props again to Yo Cherry - because they offer a rewards card that lets you redeem yourself for your previous gluttony.  Our card gets whipped out every time we are in there.  Alas, no amount of fro yo gluttony can counterbalance the cost of everything else on this lovely island, but that's neither here nor there.

No, Yo Cherry is not paying me for this. It just dawned on me the other day that my kids would rather eat a dessert at Yo Cherry, than one at home that I baked.  It's true, and I consider myself a seasoned baker with loads of high praises from the kids. 

So, when I get beat out by a fro yo place, I guess it bears pointing out. 

Tuesday, October 29, 2013

It is never to early to put your kids to work!

Can I just tell you how much joy this image brings me?



All those hours of driving him back and forth to gymnastics practice, paying for private lessons, sitting through hours on the benches waiting and watching, forcing him to practice his strength routine at home during the summer (push-ups and dips people!!)

And this is the pay off. 

The boy is now strong enough to carry full baskets of laundry up and down stairs. 

Yes!!!

I'm working on teaching them the proper Gap folding techniques, but that can wait.  For now, I have my little minions handling the stairs.  They've also learned one of the most important lessons in life.  I'm going to share it with you.

"Never go upstairs or downstairs without something in your hand."

It's key.

Friday, October 25, 2013

Happy pics on a rainy day.

It's been such a dreary week here in Bermuda.

The rain seems relentless. Summer is definitely over. I started to feel depressed, then I remembered Jordan yesterday.



This is him coming out of the house in the morning for school drop off.

It's pouring out, his jacket is askew, he can't find his umbrella. But all he does is look up and start singing.  How can you not love this kind of energy?  I grabbed my phone for a pic in between laughing from the car.

He was singing the 8's multiplication times table from "School House Rocks."

Remember those on a Saturday morning?

In the spirit of further happy pics, here's what we've been up to.



Uncle Osman came to visit Bermuda!  Oh Mina.  You kill me. 



He took some lovely family pic of us together - a rare thing indeed.  The view from St. George's coastline, just across from Fort Catherine. P.S, don't go to the fort on a Sunday and expect to get in.



He got us out to the beach a couple more times while he was here. Bermuda weather managed to pull it together for his trip enough to enjoy and extended summer day on the beach.   Ahh... Tucker's.  It will probably be awhile before I see you again.

Monday, October 14, 2013

Easing into Monday.

One word - organization.

Lunchboxes disinfected and ready to be packed?
Hot lunch tickets cut out and put in lunchbox?
Tupperware out on the counter with all the inner compartment boxes ready to go?
Water bottles clean?
Uniforms ready?
Gym uniforms (a/k/a "kits") clean and in the bags?
Confirmed they have sneakers at school, if not then packed?
Backpacks in their place?
Reading logs signed?
School pouches in the backpack?

Yes?

Ok then.. you can lounge on the couch before bedtime and watch "House Hunters International."



Happy Mondays when the work is done the night before. 

Mina takes after me.  Look at the system she's developed for keeping her water bottle and gym bag within easy reach at drop off.  Love it.



I'd much rather lounge on the couch on a Sunday night than do more stuff... but...

As much as I hate Mondays.. especially Monday mornings... I hate being rushed around feeling disorganized even more.

Friday, September 27, 2013

Radishes and butter - a random recipe.

I try to limit the kids extra curricular activities these days to one sport, an instrument and a language.  It's not a perfect system, but I think we're in a good place this year.  The kids are busy, hopefully becoming "well rounded;" and we still have days off plus regular family dinner time.

Except, there are days when we don't.  Hello, gymnastics!

Gymnastics takes up 5 hours of practice a week.  On Thursdays, Jordan has two hours of gymnastics for the Jr. Boys team. Unfortunately, the hours are 5:30 to 7:30. It also takes a half hour or more to get out there, and that's on days when I'm not driving the car pool to pick up two team mates. Somewhere in this time frame I also have to make sure he does his homework.  By the time he gets home, it's close to 8:15, and he's exhausted.  He takes his transplant meds, showers, and crashes.

The kid is a twig. He needs to eat something substantial before he goes off to burn 10,000 calories in a sweltering, non-AC gym.

He begs for pizza on gymnastics days. So I give in. Most times, we pick some up en route to the gym, but sometimes, we do it at home too.

While the pizza heats up, I try to tempt him with other things.

He's been a radish kick lately. Don't ask me why. When you have a picky kid, you learn to celebrate every new advancement in their taste buds.

Doesn't matter.

I found this ooh-la-la chic French snack on the pages of Saveur magazine, and went with it.

The radish and butter sandwich.

Leave the salted butter out for awhile to soften up. I went with a brand called "Presidente," which claimed to be French, but sounds Spanish to me.  I think I prefer the Irish salted butter I normally use when I bake homemade bread - Kerrygold.



He devoured three huge pieces.

But it may just have been the salted butter .. or the bread. Like me, the kid loves his carbs and his sodium.

Not sure what happened to the love of radishes though. They became more garnish like with each piece he ate. After three servings, he flat out just asked for a hunk of bread with "just butter."

And then he ate two slices of pizza, grapes, and some corn on the cob.

He said he'd wait for after practice for his dessert.



If only I could bottle this metabolism.

Monday, July 29, 2013

Food rut

I love summer, but I can't stand cooking in this heat.

It makes me feel fat. 

Like these.



As we speak, I've managed to finish making beef spare ribs in the crockpot..

Yay!  No oven.. and some brownies for the kids for camp tomorrow.. Yay! A mix!

The thought of making a side dish is already exhausting me. Raw carrots, anyone? With ranch dip?

ugh.. can't we just have fruit for dinner?  I mean grapes, that is? Forget it.. I mean wine.. let's just have wine for dinner.

I shamelessly borrowed that from facebook. I'm not that clever in real life.

For the billionth time, I am praying to God for a personal chef who would cook me healthy meals every day and portion them out on my plate and slap my hand if I tried to reach for more.

Wednesday, June 29, 2011

Once in a lifetime... water flowing underground.

I decided to take a suggestion from Kelly, over at Kelly's Korner, and just do a post on what a random day of the week looks like.

Thursday, June 29, 2011

Today was the last day of school for the kids. It was a half day, because of course, "last" day is synonymous with "half" day. What? You didn't know that? It is. And it's understood cross-culturally as well. I always remember back in the U.S., the kids had a half day at their pre-school.

Mina called from the top of the stairs, "Mommy, do I have to wear my uniform today?"

"No, it's grub day. You can wear whatever you want." I mentally cringe at the thought of what she is going to come downstairs in. Damn, I should have put a restriction on it. I ponder the origins of the word grub and wonder why it's used in this context.



Jordan continues to sleep. He had a rough night. Repeat wake ups, crying, bathroom breaks. He's tired.



Downstairs, I pour the coffee.

Thankfully, I had prepared the machine the night before, so all I had to do was press a button. Good thing because I could barely open my eyes.



Literally.

Seeing the doctor today to deal with whatever eye infection I've managed to pick up. This seems to be the week of doctors. Pediatrician, bone scans, eye doctors. We have weeks like that sometimes. Hopefully this one will be over soon.

Normally, Jeff handles the morning routine downstairs (coffee, Oscar, kid breakfast) but he had to be out of town for a couple days for work.

I get my breakfast ready and feed Oscar, our dog, who is winding around my legs like a cat and shuffling his wet nose into my legs. I feel a twinge of sympathy because it's probably been at least three days since I shaved my legs.

Mina comes downstairs with hair wet from last night's bath, wearing a too short tee - shirt and a size 2T pink ballet tutu. I look at her, and mentally debate what I could say that won't make her remember this moment in the future and decide she hates me.

"Maybe you should wear some shorts under those, Mina," I half-heartedly suggest. Is this really a battle I want to fight, I wonder.

She flashes me her Cinderella underwear and looks shocked that I don't think the outfit is perfect as is.

"Awwwh...." her standard response. She goes upstairs to add a pair of pink shorts to the ensemble. I'm surprised she didn't put up more of a fight. Maybe it was seeing the actual tag on the tutu that said "2T." I let Oscar out of the house. Dog hasn't had a decent walk in days.



I ready the gift bags for the teachers - painted pencil boxes, handmade cards inscibed with her gratitude, Some cute, felted craft magnets, and a bit of chocolate. Repeat idea of ones made before for teachers back home. I bought the wood boxes from Michael's craft store in the U.S way back in February and held on to them.

I also contributed to the parent's monetary collection to buy the teachers something more practical (gift cards, travel vouchers - travel vouchers are a Bermuda thing.) I'm sure the kid's cards will be appreciated, but I'm a big fan of practicality. I also added a card of my own to all of the teachers. I know I always appreciated it when people I worked with took a minute to thank me for my efforts. And I think teachers deserve to hear it from parents as well. Being a teacher is HARD work. The little I know of it (weekly reading with the kids at school, volunteering at class parties, etc) is exhausting. Imagine doing that, plus trying to actually teach them something every day!



We went with a bird theme this year as ornithology was a major topic of interest for one of my kids. And thus, by default, it became a family activity for BOTH of the kids. So much so that Jordan now actually knows what ornithology means and that he wants to be an ornithologist one day. And a chef. And own a pizza restaurant. And travel to India. On Air India. But he only has $0.65 in his piggy bank right now, so it might take some time to save for a ticket. And cab fare, since I refuse to drive him to the airport.

Jordan did not go to school. Again. He's been home all week. We saw the doctor yesterday and she said he had an ear infection. He may also have strep throat, depending on the test results. He's on antibiotics. When he came downstairs, I noticed he was warm again. I gave him some of his meds, he drank some milk and water and refused to eat anything. Mina wolfed down a waffle, some strawberries, and suggested I make her a round of pancakes. I suggested she go brush her hair.

I rounded up the gift bags, made a quick partial lunch for Mina (it's a "half-day after all; no real lunch). Got the kids in the car and navigated my way down North Shore Road. Surprisingly, after nine months, I'm actually kind of comfortable driving on the left hand side of the road. The narrow roads don't make me break into a flop sweat anymore. The kids argue about the music on the Ipod. I don't even attempt to listen to the audiobook I really want (Women, Food and God by Geneen Roth). Talking Heads plays. I admire the way the sun sparkles off the water on Shelly Bay. I do the Bermuda thing and let a car turn in front of me. He toot-toots his horn. Another Bermuda thing.

At school, I park along the field I leave Jordan in the car with the AC on and his stuffed cow for company. No, we don't do this in the U.S. Here, it's done all the time. I'm not too worried. Teachers are 20 feet away supervising kids in the drop off area.

Mina and I trudge into the building. I continue to wear my sunglasses and pretend to be chic mommy, rather than mommy with raging eye infection and hairy legs. We leave a present for Jordan's teacher in her classroom. Mina admires Tuck the turtle swimming around in the tank. No turtles in the US, I remember. Someone told me most classrooms ban them after a salmonella scare. Apparently the news hasn't hit Bermuda yet. I wonder who's taking care of the turtle over the summer. I feel sorry for turtle. All that swimming.

Mina runs into her classroom holding the gift bags. She stops to show them off to a friend and marvels at the chocolates and crafty magnets. I hope nothing falls out. On the way back to the car, I stop and talk with one of the teachers responsible for summer camp next week. I discuss whether she's seen my email regarding the balance. She hasn't. She finds a receipt with the balance due and hands it to me. I stare, cough, and thank her. Sigh. That's a big balance. Must double check her figures. Math anxiety hits me.

We drive home. I notice mallards in Harrington Sound bay and point them out to Jordan. The boats bob gently and the sun sends sparkles across the water. We discuss how old the lead duckling was. We decide he was a teenager because he wasn't following his parents.

At home, I finish giving Jordan the remainder of his medication. He refuses to eat, but grudgingly drinks some Buddy Fruit smoothie and settles himself on the couch for Tom and Jerry. I empty the dishwasher, wipe down the utensils which never seem to get dry, load up breakfast dishes, and ignore the sticky syrup that's all over my fingers. Wash. Remember I have to call the water people and order a tank refill. Our neighbor told me there's a five day waiting period because of the drought.

Normally, this time of the day, I'm usually running; but since I've been forced to give up running for the foreseeable future, I've found it hard to motivate myself to exercise at all. I hate the gym. I hate lifting weights. I grudgingly ride a bike or an elliptical. I've tried water aerobics and water jogging (fail, fail, fail.) I do however still watch what I eat. I'm convinced that diet is more important than exercise for maintaining or losing weight. And eventually, I will run again. And those happy endorphins will return.

I wipe down the counters then check Jordan's temperature. 99.2

I try calling water guy. Call goes straight to automated cell message. I call secondary water guy. He tells me he has three people on hold and could I use the online option? I'm shocked the company is forward thinking enough to have that and proceed to go online. I arrange a day for delivery and wonder whether this will actually work.

I check Jordan. He's moved on to the computer in the office and is playing Yo Gabba Gabba on Nick Jr. He says he feels ok. His eyes are heavy lidded and droopy which always happens when he's sick. But this is the most energetic I've seen him this morning, so I leave him alone. I debate whether I should try to get him to eat something.

It's 10:30. I have to pick up Mina from school in one hour. I mentally triage all household chores that need to get done and decide to vacuum living room.

Mid carpet, I'm interrupted by loud pounding on front door. I look through glass to see man standing there. It's the bug-sprayers. He's going to do the outside of the house. I nod and wonder whether its the chemicals that have caused him to look this way.

Jeff IM's me wanting to know what Jordan's doing. "Watching Smurfs," I reply. Discuss temperature, mood and probiotics.

I launch a full out cleaning assault on bedrooms and bathrooms upstairs. When there's so much sick in the house, I feel like a full scale germ warfare is underway and I have to go even more crazy with cleaning. I scrub bathrooms and disinfect everything with bleach and chlorox wipes. I clean off handles and light switches and door knobs. I stare at the soap dispenser in Jordan's bathroom and wonder why, after nine months, the soap is only halfway gone. In Mina's bathroom, I wonder why she has six toothbrushes on her sink.

I think about the comment a friend on Facebook made. She's an ex-pat, who lives in a "developing country." Regarding cleaning, she said,

"Hire someone. Isn't that one the benefits of moving to "these places?"

"I have someone," I replied. "Her name is me, myself and I."

Uh. "These places???" gag.

Anyways, I can't do cleaning people. I've tried many times. We don't work out. I'm neurotic and obsessive- compulsive and passive-aggressive. And they are usually normal and just want to do their job and go home. I clean before they get there, while they are there, and afterwards. It just never works. I try to be nice and just let them do things their way. That never works, so I tell them a few specific things I need done. They are good for a few weeks then get sloppy about something else. Weeks go by and my anger starts building up as I think about all the other ways I could spend that money. And usually 6 months to a year has passed and I let them go. They have no idea what they did wrong and I chalk it up to an "It's not you, it's me" type explanation.

Do you see why I need to run again? It's the only thing that calms the non-stop crazy voices in my head. The bone scan was Tuesday. Shouldn't the results be in by now?

We drove to pick up Mina from school. "Genius of Love," plays on the Ipod. Go ahead, click the link, you know you love this song.

We pull into car line and repeat performance of leaving Jordan alone with AC. I stare at mom in orange tube dress in front of me hitching up said tube dress top. Personal fashion pet peeve - if you are constantly hitching things up, pulling things down, or can't move in it, then this is not a good look for you. I do like orange though.

Get Mina. She decides at this moment to say good bye to each of her friends individually. Grab her, go find Jordan's teacher in car line. She returns work to me and thanks me for gift.

"Say a hello to Jordan for me!"

Both kids got report cards today and I'm looking forward to reading them. Orange tube dress mom returns to car line and rather than pulling forward to leave, she unrolls her window and begin chatting with a woman I thought I liked. Might as well read the report cards now since we aren't going anywhere soon.

Kids did amazing. Excellent reports in everything. Loved by their teachers and praised as helpful and a joy to have in the class. I wonder whose children are being discussed.

En route home, we stop at Pizza House - home of the worst pizza in Bermuda because Jordan requested it for lunch. Given his minimal eating the last few days, I'd be willing to stop anywhere he asked. Grab some pizza and head home. Children trudge up stairs loaded with papers and bags. I trudge up stairs loaded with papers and bags and we compare who is holding more. They dump everything in hallway. I bring everything into kitchen to sort and load.

Set out lunch.



I note picture in Mina's bag of the two of us.



I admire Jordan's journal. Love reading about his adventures. Will definitely save this.

Jordan eats slowly.



Mina runs off to play.



Kids goof around outside in sweltering heat for awhile. I am thrilled Jordan seems well enough to get off couch.



He comes in later to go to bathroom. Then shouts for help wiping. Sigh, it must have been a big one.

I park kids in front of tv to take a shower. When I get downstairs they haven't moved. Babysitter arrives. I put kids down for a nap and leave to go see eye doctor.

Eye doctor visit was successful. Continue to be charmed by quaint Bermuda custom where each patient, upon arriving into waiting room, looks around room and states, "good afternoon" to the public generally. So endearing. Doctor does not keep me waiting! Doctor is lovely and thorough and does not admonish me for the self medicating I have been doing the last two weeks. Remarks as well that the lasik work I had done years ago is excellent. "Wonderful flaps! So neat!" I take credit for it as though I was somehow responsible. NJ girls - I went to TLC laser vision center. He prescribed the right kind of eye drops after dilating my eyes thoroughly. Oops. Did not realize that was coming and wonder how I am going to drive home.

Mental note to self - don't drive with dilated eyes. I get to pharmacy for drugs. Pharmacist and aide have seen me here three times this week and pass looks reserved for haggard mothers and drug abusers. I'm in the former category. They marvel at my amazingly dilated eyes and confirm the time, since I can't read my phone.

I get home by adopting the technique Jeff and I call "Badge of Pride." Badge of Pride drivers take it upon themselves to obey the Bermuda speed limit of 20mph at any cost. Everyone else can go to hell. In my case, I adopt it to save lives, starting with my own. People are capable of walking faster than my car moves.

I get home. Kids still napping. Babysitter marvels at my huge pupils.

I wake up kids. Jordan is cool. He comes downstairs with some energy and begins playing with Mina. I start dinner. Kids request pasta. I agree and caution that this is only because they are getting over sick and don't expect to get "kiddie choice" every night. They nod solemnly and laugh behind my back.

Jeff IM's me and we discuss results of meeting. I laugh at his description of it. Feel waves of exhaustion suddenly. The drops burn. My eyes are as red as the rage ghouls from 28 Days Later. I'm not as angry though. That was a good movie. I wish we had it on DVD; I feel like watching it now. Although watching a scary movie alone at home when Jeff is not here is a bad idea. No doubt I'll be up again during the night with kids so its doubly a bad idea. Should just watch NJ housewives and be grateful no one is snarking commentary from the side chair. Feel sad no one will be snarking commentary from the side chair. I love snarky commentary. But not during Gilmore Girls.

Phone call from pediatrician to follow up on Jordan. I tell her he seems on the mend. She is happy but still no results from strep test. Check in tomorrow. Kids begin fighting over computer. I pause and debate whether to interfere. Silence. They seem to be working it out. I read caution warnings for my drops. I note that water guy two has not called to confirm appointment for tomorrow and suspect I will have to call again.

Water is boiling. I break apart pasta in same way as Michael Keaton in the movie, "My Life." Am I the only one who's ever seen this movie? I don't blame you if you haven't. Nicole Kidman whispered her way through that movie as she has done in just about every other movie she's ever been in. But Michael Keaton I just love. Or maybe I just love his character in Mr. Mom. I get them confused.

Wonder what some friends are feeding their kids for dinner tonight.

Feel nauseous suddenly. The drops?



Feed Oscar. Look how nicely he sits waiting for his food. I wish for the hundredth time that someone existed whose sole purpose was to cook for me and feed me on a strict portion controlled diet each day and never allow me any treats. Oscar inhales his food. Amazing.

Armed for battle I warn the kids it is dinner time.

"Time to wash hands!" I shout.

Surprisingly, they don't fight over who gets to wash hands first. They come to table. Jordan discusses how to make a jam sandwich. Mina asks whether Jordan has meds hidden in his milk. I say no. He can take his meds without that. Jordan doesn't eat much dinner; but takes his antibiotics without a fuss. Mina watches. Shamelessly, I cheer him on. He swallows down almost 7 ml in seconds. It took Mina hours to finish 5 ml which we mixed with juice, water, applesauce, milkshakes... ANYTHING!!



Jordan goes to lay down on couch. Mina leaves table and begins chatting with him. No dessert tonight I guess. Feel conked and need to get kids back on a schedule. On cue, Mina reminds me we haven't practiced violin today. I look at Jordan laying on couch and promise we will do it tomorrow when everyone is feeling better.

Time for bath, regular meds, stories and lullabyes.

Bath became a disaster as Mina insisted Jordan get out first, even though he got out first yesterday. I know she is just tired when she says,

"He should get out first EVERY day!"

They chose short stories - Curious George and the Dump Truck, Ten Stars Twinkled. Mina read hers twice.

Time for the "four things" each of them talks to me about individually before they sleep. The four things are usually pretty random; but Jordan almost always says, "I love you mom." That alone is worth delaying bed time for.

Mina chose to use her four things to complain about having to get out of the bathtub first.

Hopefully, no multiple wake ups tonight.

8:15 pm.

I look forward to crashing on couch with vino, goofing around on computer and watching Bravo.

8:16 pm, I hear Mina sobbing. As I go upstairs I tell myself to stay calm, say nothing because no matter what it will never be the right thing. Don't get mad. Just ask her what's wrong.

I walk in. She is sitting straight up in bed sobbing and glaring at me.

"What's wrong," I say?

"I'm staying up all night long!" She screams.

"Ok." I say. "But you have to stay up all night long in your bed."

"With your head on the pillow."

"And the covers pulled up."

"Fine!! She screamed. "But I want my drapes open."

I walk over and open them, then leave the room.

8:44 pm. Silence.

This was an epic post and colossally boring. But, I have a sneaking suspicion that one day, when my babies have flown the nest, I might wonder what we did all day long when they were still young enough to listen to my opinions and thought I had all the answers.

Saturday, February 05, 2011

MIA. Hi there!

In other news, Jordan came home on Friday with his school portrait. Behold! The missing Beatle.



I just love this. This is Jordan in all his shaggy glory. But, wow. When did he get so big? Looking at this picture too long, almost makes me see the teenager he is going to become.

((( Shudder)))

He's not allowed to grow up so fast. Especially if growing up means suddenly expressing your opinion all over the place.



Exhibit A:
This is what happens when your child learns how to write. This is Jordan's hate filled screed dedicated to me. His mom. The one that gave birth to him. The one that labored through hours of nausea and dry heaves. The one that lay by his bedside sobbing in tears and praying while he was on ECMO. The one that went on national television television and relived every agonizing detail of his story so that people would know that real people's lives were affected by organ donation. The one who's picture was splashed across the major newspapers of NYC. The one that stood at the alter in St. Patrick's Cathedral, choking back sobs before the entire audience, to publicly thank the mom - Nikki and her angel - Breanna - who gave you another chance at life.

Me.

The one that carried you for 42 weeks and has sweated every single decision I've ever made with respect to your care. EVERY. SINGLE. ONE.

He wrote:

"Dear Mom I hate you soooo much 'cause you're so mean You're one of the meanest mommies ever."

The backdrop was a time out. That came about because he literally screamed at me in protest when I had the audacity to suggest he pick up his toys before running out the door to play. Following the screaming, I put him into time out without the usual warnings. Once the time out was over, we sat down together and talked about why he had been punished and why screaming in this situation was a bad idea. I thought I was clear. I thought he understood. He nodded and then went downstairs to the art table and went ahead and penned his "card." He handed it to me very politely, then went outside to play.

I, of course, burst into tears

Sometimes, I just don't know what it is I'm doing as a mom. There are so many times when I find myself thinking that no matter what, I just can't win. When I was working full-time, the kids used to complain because I wasn't in school volunteering at parties or being the class mom. Jordan used to cry and say, "you never come on field trips with us!" I used to look at pictures of the kids from school on those trips and cringe when I saw a teacher holding their hands, instead of me.

Yet on the other hand, now that I'm a full time stay at home mom, I get comments from the kids saying, "You don't work. You don't have a job. You stay home all day."

Damned if you do. Damned if you don't. I have no answers to this. No one does. It's the eternal mothering dilemma. I've been on both sides of the equation, and it doesn't matter. One way or the other, as a mom, you will never feel like you've won on this issue. There are times I miss working. And there are countless other times when I am so glad that I have the privilege of being home with them now, getting involved in their schools, and helping them the best way I can.

Moms just can't win.

The best we can hope to do is keep trying to do our best.

"All I knew how to do was keep on keepin on..." said one of my favorite songsters.




Exhibit B: Why I think Jeff is the best father ever.

Jeff knew how upset I was about Jordan's note. He asked me if I had talked to him about it, and I said that I hadn't. When Jordan handed me the note, all I did was say thank you. "I'm glad you wrote down how you feel." But that evening, I was pretty much holding back tears. In the morning, after fixing him his breakfast, Jeff must have sat down with Jordan and spoke to him about what happened. While I was out on my run, Jordan worked on a new card. And when I read it, I burst into tears again.

"Mommy I love you I'm sorry love Jordan."

Sigh.. Do I have the best guys or what?

Despite being in Bermuda, arguably one of the most beautiful places ever, the quotidian details of our life still have to be managed. Among them, basic childhood development.



A few weeks back, we were in the "dollar" store getting some miscellaneous item. Both kids were with me. Don't ask me why. Miss Mina saw some toy that she decided she absolutely, positively, must have right then and there.

I said no.

Why?

Well... "No," because ABSOLUTELY nothing in the "dollar" store in Bermuda is actually a dollar. That's kind of why I have those parenthetical quotes around the word.

And two - there was no reason the child needed another toy. She had just been graced with a grandparent visit that included lots of toys. We just had Christmas with lots of toys. We're still getting Christmas packages trickling in with, let me repeat, LOTS of toys.

So, I passed on the opportunity to spend $30 on a Barbie at the "Dollar" store.

When we got home, I suggested a new approach to the toy situation. "Let's earn them!" I said cheerfully! We carefully discussed a point system for earning toys. 10 points for an "itty-bitty" toy; 20 for a medium one; 30 for "BIG TOY." I would be the ultimate arbitrator of determining size of toys. I gave them ball park estimates based on toys they already own. I also warned them that BAD behavior would result in points being taken away.





With steadfast determination, Miss Mina earned her points. Each day, she did the small tasks without muster or fail. She's a smartie though. She's made a point of reminding me that certain things are worthy of a "tick." (There's that Brit talk again. We used to call them check-marks)





But, as of Friday, she earned her thirty points. We went back to the dollar store and she purchased her own "big toy." It was a golf set that consisted of two plastic clubs, two plastic golf balls, and three putting markers.

What I loved best was her joy in sharing the toy with her big brother. She happily handed him a club too - so they could play together.

She just kills me.

All the golf practice came in handy. We hit the miniature golf circuit this weekend. Despite the rain.









Fishing the ball out of the obstacles became more exciting than the game itself, methinks.



Forced family shot.

So, life in Bermuda continues to be pretty darn good. I have thankfully avoided shovelling snow for the foreseeable future. This fact alone confirms my belief that there is a God. I can still remember last February when I was shovelling two feet of snow in my driveway, navigating minivan road slides on Christie Street, and cursing nature for the never-ending white blanket that was around me.

I remember praying that I would be happy if I never saw snow again in my life.



Thanks, God. We are truly blessed.



Back to reality... with the good, there's the icky. No snow.. but rain or shine - these things are always crawling up and down the outside of our house.



I hear they're good with a little garlic and butter.

There's flying cockroaches too. I haven't seen any in the house yet, but when I walk Oscar I see them squished on the street. They are ENORMOUS. Bigger than any NYC cockroach I have ever seen.

(((shudder)))

Tuesday, August 31, 2010

A day in the life.

Today was my last day at work. So, I thought, why not present a pictorial snapshot of what it looks like? Minus the unruly lawyers, delinquent children, and dysfunctional families? Oh, and the part where I actually work. No one really wants to see that.

The kids also came by to visit at lunchtime because I wanted to prove to them that I actually did have a job I went to every morning.



Point A. Leonia, NJ. Out the door, walking to the bus stop. Notice how bright and sunny it is. That's because I'm late. It's also because it's summer. Come November, it's pitch black out. It's also pitch black out when I return.



On the bus. I can't really complain about the bus. We happen to be very lucky in that we live relatively close to the bus stop. The bus runs express all morning till 10:00, and it's a lot easier than trying to drive in. Especially since I fall asleep within fifteen minutes. Try doing that in a minivan going over the Brooklyn Bridge! Wait.. I think it's been done.



Pulling into Port Authority. This is usually about the point when I wake up. Once upon a time, Jeff and I used to ride the bus in together (awww..) and he would wake me up. Now, I wait for the sound of the bus driver making the announcement. I wipe the drool off my chin and apologize to my seat companion, who I most likely have been resting my head upon the whole way. It's ok. We're all real friendly in Jersey.



The escalator at Port authority. By this point, I am usually awake, and am usually making a mad dash down the stairs to catch the A train underground.



Yeah, the picture is blurry. Which is an accurate reflection of how I perceive things at this hour.



Notes from the underground world. This picture does not do justice to the smell, the heat in the summer, or the cold in the winter. I also couldn't really take pictures of the half dozen wackadoos that make the city such an interesting place to live, and who conveniently choose to share my commute with me. I did not take their pictures because I have lived here long enough to know that a camera in their face is an open invitation to kill/rob/toss me off the platform.



Jay Street/Boro Hall. Brooklyn. My stop. The new and improved Kings County Family and Supreme Court. This building is amazing. I say that as a veteran of the old Family Court which used to be located a block away. I am going to miss this place.



My office. I've stripped it pretty clean of decoration, since I needed to pack everything up today. But this can give you an edited idea.



And here's what I'm really thinking.



I kept the back wall pictures up because I wanted to make sure the kids knew I did not throw out their artwork. I actually do save it. It covered most of this wall, as well as my conference room downstairs.



Here's the courtroom where I worked. I've provided a handy guide to show you where the key players sit. I think someone should make a diagram like this for the poor souls who wander in on a daily basis and have no idea who everyone is milling about.



Normally, I bring my lunch to work in an effort to stay healthy and save money. Today however, was all about celebrating. After I showed the kids around, we headed downtown to Pete's Waterfront Alehouse to meet up with another Family Court veteran. Jeff almost had a heart attack when she called ahead and told us she thought the place was closed. Jeff, who went to law school nearby, spent many a study hour nestled within the confines of these cozy chairs. Thankfully, it was not closed. This place has survived multiple recessions, 9/11, and bad 80's mullets (come in and take a look at the picture on the side wall). Nothing is shutting this oasis down.

After lunch... we packed the kids up, grabbed my boxes from work. and I said my final good byes. Wow, this was a short stint back at work. I really am going to miss the job, but I hope our next adventure will be an equally exciting one.

Next stop - finding a house!!